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Old Mar 28, 2008, 5:40 am   #1
Name: Frank
Central, Michigan USA
Midland Co.
Join Date: Feb 7, 2003
Posts: 8,245

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Trip to the vet

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm sure. The duck is dead" he replied.
"How can you be so sure?" she protested, "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.

He returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.
As the owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat.
The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its beak to its tail and back again.
The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.

The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.

"$300!" she cried. "$300 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $40."

"But with the Lab report and the Cat scan, It all adds up."
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Old Mar 28, 2008, 7:13 am   #2
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Name: Gary
Northern, Michigan USA
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LOL...that was one of my dads favorite jokes....
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Old Mar 28, 2008, 8:00 am   #3
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Name: George
Southern, Michigan USA
Join Date: Feb 8, 2003
Posts: 744


Keep them coming. Too funny.


Eat Dessert First, Life Is Short!
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Old Mar 28, 2008, 9:46 am   #4
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Name: tom
Southern, Ohio usa
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good one frank.guess there is a joker in every bunch. tom
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Old Mar 28, 2008, 3:09 pm   #5
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Name: jonathan
Central, Michigan usa
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Old Mar 28, 2008, 4:49 pm   #6
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Name: Wayne
Southern, Michigan USA
Join Date: Mar 15, 2008
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Frank, my wife works for a vet, and I can't wait till she gets home to show it to her. That one made my day!
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Old May 30, 2008, 4:06 pm   #7
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Northern, Indiana USA
Wells County
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Very nice. Good Friday afternoon humor material to pass around the office. Thanks!
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Old May 30, 2008, 4:15 pm   #8
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Name: Donna
Central, Michigan USA
Saginaw Co.
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ROFL Funny.

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Old May 30, 2008, 5:24 pm   #9
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Name: Lowell
Southern, Ohio USA
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My daughter sent me the following: A man who was great at inventions invented a Lie Detecting Robot. He brought it home, and that afternoon his 13-year-old son came home from school three hours late. The father asked him why he was late. The son said, "Some of the guys and I went to the library to work on a project." The robot went over to the boy and smacked him. The father explained that it was a lie-detecting robot. The boy then told his father that he had really gone to a friends house to watch a movie. "What movie?" asked Dad. "The Ten Commandments". The robot came over and knocked the boy up side of the head. The father said, "Son, when I was a boy, I never lied to my parents." At that, the robot knocked Dad down. Mom, who was watching, began laughing, and said to the father, "You have no one to blame but yourself. He's your son!" The robot then went over and knocked her clear out of her chair!
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Old May 31, 2008, 7:47 am   #10
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